Let’s face it. There are the live cam sessions we want, and then there are the live cam sessions we get. Sometimes they’re the same thing, but expecting every cam session to go perfectly is like expecting to make dinner plans with every girl you hit up at a bar. It’s the goal, not necessarily the reality.
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What about the cam sessions that do go your way, though? If you and your chat partner are both interested in doing more than just a bit of flirting, it can definitely be considered a digital one-night stand. Just like in real life, a live cam session on a site like Flingster could start with dirty chat, and end with getting hot and heavy – just not in person.
Even though live sex cam interactions have a lot of similarities to real-life situations, it’s still a different dynamic. This can lead to some confusion about how fast you can take things, how far you can go, and which boundaries do and don’t need to be respected. If you want to have more successful online one-night stands, just keep reading – you might learn some things you didn’t expect!
Emotional attachments are usually still off the table
It’s the classic blunder – you hook up with someone, it’s only supposed to be for one night, but you end up catching feelings. The same thing can happen with cam chats, but the situation is even tricker because you haven’t even met them in person.
If you’re on an adult chat site, you may or may not be able to get back in touch with them after the chat has ended. If you’re both members on the chat site this would probably be possible, but don’t assume that your former chat partner will want another session with you. There’s nothing wrong with asking, of course; you simply have to manage your expectations, just like in real life.
If you’re on a cam girl site, the situation is even more awkward – you’ve fallen for someone who was literally just doing her job. In a way, you could be forgiven for feeling like there was some kind of connection; after all, intimacy is exactly what a skilled webcam model tries to replicate in a show. The problem is when you have a hard time separating fact from fiction. As a general rule, it’s safe to assume that the cam girl doesn’t want your love and loyalty; she just wants a good tip in exchange for a good performance.
Remember why the other person is there
Video chats and cam shows are quite a bit different from each other, but here’s something they have in common: the person you’re chatting with isn’t there to find everlasting love. Just like with a real-world one-night stand, it probably wouldn’t go over well if you tried to turn that one interaction into anything more than it was supposed to be. You’re absolutely allowed to feel whatever you feel, but you have to let them do the same.
Most of the people on an adult video chat site are there for the same purpose – to have an online fling. Not only do they not expect it to go further than that, they probably don’t want it to go further than that. This is one of the appealing things about adult chat sites: there’s no commitment, and you stay totally anonymous. If someone’s on a site that specifically offers virtual one-night stands with zero strings attached, they’re going to be pretty surprised if someone offers something that’s basically the opposite.
If a chat partner would get surprised when someone offered to date them, imagine what a webcam model would think! Contrary to what some guys like to imagine, webcam models don’t need to be raised up from their undignified circumstances; this isn’t 17th-century England. Even if they don’t love their jobs, most of them still make good money, which they can use to lead fulfilling lives. As you view a webcam show, remember why the model is doing what she’s doing. She’s using her talents to provide a service, not to seduce you (even if that contradicts appearances).
Just because the dynamic is different doesn’t mean there aren’t still boundaries
Online adult cam chats are famously fast-paced. If you land the right chat partner, you can be talking dirty to each other within seconds, and getting up to a lot more in less than a minute. Some adult chat sites are known for nudity, while others cater to various kinks and fetishes. The permission to be yourself and pursue what you like online can be very liberating, but it doesn’t mean that you have a free pass to do whatever you like to everyone you meet. In fact, it wouldn’t be a bad idea to quickly check with each new chat partner what they’re interested in doing. That way you can both be on the same page; if you aren’t a good match for each other, you’ve found out at the beginning and not at the end of the interaction.
This isn’t too hard to remember on an adult chat site, but if we’re talking about webcam models, some people feel like making a payment entitles them to ignore a lot of boundaries. Many webcam models specialize in certain niches, and while this tells you what they will do, it may also be a way of saying what they won’t do. You can certainly ask if they’ll incorporate something into a performance, but if they turn you down, just find someone else who’ll do it. Just like you shouldn’t insist that a real-life sex partner does something they aren’t comfortable with, you shouldn’t try to cross those boundaries with a cam girl either.
The bottom line is that while live cam sessions can feel a lot less inhibited than real life, you’re still basically having a one-night stand. You get to skip the usual commitments of an actual relationship, but you also have to respect many of the same boundaries.
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